We all want to be accepted as we are but beware! In relationship, this is a common escape from intimacy, a refusal to be vulnerable, to own up to our mistakes, to learn from our partner. Taken even further the statement: “This is who I am, take it or leave it” has the ring of psychopathy about it…an impenetrable shield of control! Most of us don’t even know who we truly are and the journey to such a discovery begins with the self-inquiry ‘Who am I?”. If our starting point is ‘THIS is who I am’ then we will never get beyond our egoic armouring and all ‘growth’ will be little more than shifting the furniture around or adding a new painting on the wall. Real growth is a complete deconstruction and reconstruction of the entire house…and it takes hard work, courage, patience and time!